For most people, Valentine’s Day is a day for couples to show their affection for each other through sweet gestures and thoughtful gifts, but for a single person like me, it’s easy to get tired of scrolling through hundreds of Instagram pictures of couples proudly displaying their relationships. Being surrounded by romance may only be a minor annoyance to me, but for many it can be quite a depressing and confidence-dashing experience.

Underneath those jokes about celebrating Valentine’s Day alone with ice cream and Netflix, many teens and adults may be dealing with loneliness and even low self-esteem in general. And while some manage to cope with these feelings by showing affection towards those they are close to, the holiday can still be painful for those that don’t have this option — such as those who lack close relationships with family or friends in the first place.

That’s not to say that Valentine’s Day hasn’t evolved at all for the better. With more and more positive celebrations of alternative definitions of romance and the introduction of traditions like ‘Galentine’s Day,’ the holiday is definitely broadening its meaning. However, maybe there’s more that needs to change. It’s about time that the holiday emphasizes another important type of love: self-love. It’s something that anyone can—and should—practice because how can you cultivate healthy relationships at all unless you love and respect yourself first?

Our society is just beginning to realize the value of self-love and of finding happiness in independence, so the current message that Valentine’s Day is sending—that it takes admiration from someone else to truly feel special—seems rather outdated and contradictory. In fact, according to multiple sources, U.S. marriage rates are at their lowest in the last 150 years, which just goes to show that many people are simply beginning to chase their own goals and dreams before relationships. This makes it all the more important that self-love is something that we learn to prioritize as a community.

So what can each of us do to celebrate the idea of loving ourselves on Valentine’s Day? Well, it starts with something as simple as showing yourself as much care and appreciation as a loved one. Take time to do what makes you happy. Write down positive affirmations. Or simply treat yourself, instead of waiting for someone else to do so.