Overheard at Thanksgiving dinner

Graphic by Isabella Kneeshaw.

Emma Regimbald, Staff Writer

Thanksgiving – That special holiday that we all associate with turkey, pumpkin pie and, of course, whether you look forward to it or dread it, long conversations with your moody relatives. Despite all the chaos of the holidays, there’s something special about getting to catch up with family and friends that you haven’t seen in a while. 

However, contrary to popular belief, some of the best conversations at the dinner table are those overheard without context, perhaps on the other side of the table. Without further ado, here are some of the most interesting things overheard during Thanksgiving. 

 

Guest 1: Do you smell that? 

Guest 2: Yeah, it smells like something is burning. 

Guest 3: Don’t worry guys, I think it’s just the turkey…

Guest 3: Oh my god, I forgot about the turkey! 

 

Guest 1: Is your turkey burnt too?

Guest 2: Yeah, this entire meal is a bit of a let-down. 

Guest 1: Quick, pass me your phone!

Guest 2: Why? What are you doing? 

Guest 1: Hello? Yes, hi, I would like to order a pizza. 

 

Guest 1: Wow, [Guest 2] finished her plate super quickly!

Guest 3: Don’t be a fool. We all know that she’s been slipping turkey to the dog. 

Guest 2: Shhhhh…

 

Child 1: Guys, look at [Child 2]. He has mashed potatoes all over his face. 

Child 3: Yeah, what is he doing? 

Child 2: What is everyone looking at? Do I have something in my teeth? 

 

Guest 1: So, [Guest 2], how are you liking that sweater I knitted for you?

Guest 2: Hm? Oh, that sweater! I love it. 

Guest 3: That’s strange, I thought I saw that sweater in the donation box last week.

Guest 2: What? That’s impossible. Must’ve been a different sweater. 

Guest 3: Are you sure? Because I’m almost positive that- 

Guest 2: Eat your turkey. 

 

Guest 1: Can you pass me the sauce? 

Guest 2: So you can drop it on the tablecloth like you did last year? No thanks. I spent hours trying to remove that stain. 

Guest 3: [Guest 2], be nice to [Guest 1]. [Guest 1], if I hand you this sauce, you better not drop it. 

 

Guest 1: Huh. That’s strange, did anyone order a pizza?

Guest 2: Nope! Let’s keep it anyways. 

 

And there you go – six wonderful snippets of conversation that will hopefully inspire you to pay close attention to the dialogue around you next time you attend a family gathering. Although it can be both a blessing and a curse, engaging in awkward conversation with relatives provides a much needed break from schoolwork and the tasks of daily life. If you are celebrating with your friends or family over the holidays, be sure to enjoy the food, conversation and time off from school.