Love can often be measured through one’s actions, but unconditional love is a pure and selfless form of love, free of expectations and conditions. However, the idea that love means prioritizing others’ needs before your own can be misleading. In reality, love can sometimes manifest as obsessive and controlling behavior that is difficult and overwhelming to navigate, posing many challenges.
Recognizing when a relationship is becoming unhealthy and is in need of boundaries is essential. This ensures everyone’s needs are met and expectations are respected. While expressing your boundaries can be uncomfortable, it’s important to acknowledge that even unconditional love requires boundaries. Communicating your boundaries shouldn’t be seen as a barrier meant to isolate and create distance but, rather, as a form of self-care that guides you towards personal growth.
Despite boundaries and love seeming contradictory, the coexistence of the two is not only possible but essential for creating a healthy and balanced relationship.
The process of setting boundaries can feel overwhelming for many; below are a few tips to help you get started. While setting boundaries can look different for everyone depending on the type of relationship, for the most part, you should follow these general guidelines:
Identify your own needs. Recognizing your own needs is an important first step in setting boundaries. This might feel vulnerable, but it’s an act of love and care not only for others but for yourself, as well.
Acknowledge your needs without being critical. It’s important to approach boundary setting with the right mindset. While it can be hard to express your own needs as you may feel critical of yourself, you should remember that your needs are valid and deserve to be met.
Following these steps can be the start of maintaining and setting healthy boundaries within relationships, creating a space for love to thrive.
Junior Lea Olomua-Deitas shared her thoughts about setting boundaries.
“Setting boundaries gives individuals a sense of space between themselves and others,” Olomua-Deitas said. “Boundaries allow us to create an atmosphere of comfort and safety, letting ourselves know that we can prioritize our own needs. They strengthen relationships and create a clear line of consensus, trust and communication between people.”
Healthy relationships are built on a strong foundation of trust, respect and honesty. While navigating these relationships can be challenging, setting boundaries prioritizes trust, respect and honesty, strengthening the bond and creating a long-lasting impact.
