The ultimate cake review, who will win?

Cake has long been a paramount staple in the dessert sector. With countless flavor possibilities for both the cake itself and the icing, there are numerous ways to enjoy the sweet treat. 

But is all cake truly the same? Surely the higher the cost of the cake, the better it tastes. Or does it? Three members of The Wolf editor team, Matthew Brown, Teddy Fronczak and Lupita Ruiz, decided to test that theory. Together the trio indulged themselves in two different cakes at two different price points to truly test if a more expensive cake is “worth it.” 


Cake One: Costco Sheet Cake $18.99 

The infamous Costco sheet cake has been bestowed at every event, from birthdays to grad parties, class celebrations and more. This cake is incredibly low priced, retailing at $18.99 and boasting a 12-inch by 16-inch size. To put this into perspective, the cake can serve 48 guests with each slice equating to just 39-cents per person. In light of St. Patrick’s Day, taking place on March 17, the cake sampled was decked out with a colorful icing rainbow and cheerful leprechaun. 


Brown: Softer than a baby’s butt, not that I would munch on some baby booty. This cake makes me feel like I’m eating a moist cloud made of love, comfort, giggles and rainbows. If St. Patrick was still alive, he would have used the $18.99 in his pot of gold to run his a** to Costco and splurge. 


Fronczak: Absolute unit of a cake. I personally love icing, so to have a cake that’s so lovingly covered in sweet buttercream frosting from head to toe is a win for me. There’s even icing between the sponge of the cake which is a plus in my book.  


Ruiz: Nothing is more American than a Costco cake. The flavor of the icing and the moisture of the cake itself SLAPS. It’s almost too good to be true that it only costs $18.99. Every bite took me back to birthday parties with my family, moments before they shoved my face in the cake, just as every Mexican family does. 


Cake Two: Papa Haydn’s German Chocolate Cake Slice $10

Papa Haydn is infamous for its gourmet desserts. With two locations in Portland, the trio traveled downtown to sample a higher-end cake. An approximate 5-inch by 5-inch slice of the cake retails at $10, nearly 26 times the price of Costco cake slice, though it is a bigger slice. 


Brown: One slice for $10? I don’t know. Sure, the good presentation and exquisite ambiance makes me feel like a Rolex-bearing, tuxedo-wearing fancy boy, but I don’t know if it was worth it. If I had a pot of gold, I wouldn’t do any half sends. Give me a whole cake or give me death. 


Fronczak: The presentation was exquisite, with caramel sauce dressing the plate and the slice boasting chocolate swirls and glazed coconut shavings. Just as the appearance was superb, so was the cake itself. Flavorful and moist, the cake was delicious. Was it worth $10? Personally, I’m content with my 39-cent Costco slice. 


Ruiz: Not going to lie here…Costco cake is better. Although I do appreciate a nice presentation and some caramel, I am just not a fan of the coconut shavings. It gave me bad flashbacks of gross Almond Joys from Halloween from when I was younger that I would end up throwing away after they spent a couple of months in the fridge. However, the cake was quite moist. 


So, is an expensive cake “worth it”? The trio has concluded that a classic Costco cake is the way to go. It packs a plethora of sweetness for the right price.