A Horror Story: Parking in the TuHS South Lot

Amanda Fronczak, Humor Editor

The one place that truly tests a person’s character is the Tualatin High School parking lot. This 333-spot lot is where students toss their morals aside and do anything in order to beat the traffic and attempt to reach Boones Ferry before 3:50 p.m.

All aspects of the South lot bring out the competitive side deep within us. On Thursday, Aug. 5, students received an email from Marie Shockloss, the principal’s secretary, letting them know they could apply for a parking spot. It was a mad dash to fill out that Google Form. Then on the first day of school, students got in line to receive that coveted purple parking pass. 

Little did they know, the real battle had just begun. Every day, as soon as the final bell rings, the South lot becomes a zoo of students charging the exits to get to their spots. All bets are off, and just like in the animal kingdom, it becomes survival of the fittest. 

Look to the right and the sweet girl from your math class is gunning it in order to cut you off! Take another look around, and you’ll see the boy you’ve known since kindergarten strategically avoiding eye contact so he doesn’t have to let you in. Brutal. 

Some students have decided to avoid the chaos all together and sit in their cars doing homework until everyone is gone. Others have taken to sprinting to their cars, and some have even tried bartering with their teachers to let them leave early. Whatever your strategy entails, be safe and courteous to your peers, and remember, what happens in the South lot stays in the South lot.